Of course the ability to search for people who meet our criteria is part of the appeal of online dating.But while women say they have a "type"—they love bearded gingers or get off on guys in glasses—they don't filter out man who doesn't meet those specific physical criteria. It's a sweeping prejudice masquerading as sexual preference.
Which brings us to your more general task: neutralizing her insecurity by conveying that bigger is . That you don't feel like less of a man when you're with her. Some of it boils down to you owning a more classic masculinity—going in for the kiss first, deciding the dinner location, simply being more assertive.But keep in mind that, because you're asking her to question gut-level beliefs about what she finds attractive, you need to be willing to broaden your own definition of what you find attractive—and convey to her that it does not contain the phrase "smaller than me."Of course, women also have to be willing to check their own biases about short men.I consider short guys my natural allies and am constantly making the case to my female friends that they should stop fetishizing tall men. To go on even just one date with someone who falls outside of our eight-percent range, and to ask ourselves whether there's actually less chemistry there." If I'm feeling charitable, I answer honestly: "6-foot-2." They often follow-up with, "Do you ever date shorter men? And online, it's even more brutal: Women can calculate how tall they are in their highest heels, add a few inches for good measure, and then filter out men who fall below that sum. The average woman is eight percent shorter than her male partner.
I'll get there in a minute.)Women have internalized the message that it's better for us to be smaller.